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Dorit Kemsley

Médaillé de cristal

Seraph [Dynamis]

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  • 7

I got kicked from my static

Public
The other day I was kicked from my static. I knew that it was going to happen, since they had been acting strange towards me for the last few days. It wasn't a matter of if, it was a matter of when.

I was NOT upset about getting kicked, to be quite honest. I was actually happy, because I was playing a job or role that I did not initially sign up for. What I was upset about was the reasoning behind me getting kicked. I felt like most of the reasons were not valid reasons, and everything that he (NIN, static lead) said was wrong, was dropped on me all at one time. OUTSIDE of 1 instance, there were NO other conversations regarding me doing well or not. No talks about my damage or mit. No talks about gear and how it was distributed. NONE.

For the sake of anonymity, i will be referring to people by their roles, NOT their names.

I started the conversation by saying that I wanted it to be as respectful as possible, and I was high on emotions, and He responded with "Everyone is high on emotions."

I asked him what he meant by I was selfish. While he meant it in a literal sense of loot, he also meant from a teammate PoV. He said that I was selfish with mitigation (didnt use Addle on our P8S phase 1 clear,) With contributing to the conversation, Being selfish of ppls time (1-2 mins late) and apparently loot (he says i obtained the most loot out of the entire static.)

I understood I didn't use Addle and acknowledged it, then he started to attack personally ("and you used to main healer? How do you not addle AT ALL??" *Chuckle*.) I explained that I would have liked for the healers to coordinate with me when they would want me to use addle, and he responded with "why are the healers responsible for when you use addle? JUST USE IT. and I said that the healers didnt talk to me about it and he started telling me "Why dont you look at your logs and parses and work on yourself?"

He then started to attack me about being late. I acknowledged being a FEW minutes late. And when I say a few, i literally mean 1-2 minutes. He told me that he didn't care if i was 1 min, 5 mins, 15 mins late, its late and he didnt like it. I told him that we had members in our static that had "technical difficulties" that cut time out of raid. Our SAM even had their wifi cut out and we had to end raid by an hour! He then attacked me for having to take care of my brother, accusing me of "gaslighting" the static on when i needed to take a break. "Why is your brother the one making our breaks and we dont know him?" I always made sure to tell NIN when I needed to step away for 5 mins to pick my brother up from work. I would even tell him ahead of time when I needed to step away and pick him up. I was always courteous and made sure anything I had to do was known to him, and he could disseminate that. It NEVER took longer than that. He told me that there were multiple times that I took longer than 15 mins to pick him up and it was not true. The last time I had to pick my brother up while in raid, my internet went out, I immediately came home and got on my phone and told the group that i was fixing it. He said i took 15 minutes to tell him that. That was simply not true.

Next, he told me that I was being selfish with the gear, by saying that I took the most gear. In the 3 weeks that we have raided together, I have obtained 2 twine, 2 accessories, and a set of gloves. I told him that was ACTUALLY not true. He and SAM had the most gear out of the DPS, not I. I was only called selfish because I got the twine from our last run of P7S, and the tanks/healers were upset that they hadn't gotten gear in 3 weeks. For most statics, people usually prioritize DPS for savage drops, I was playing caster at the time. (NIN had 4 savage drops w. 1 accessory upgrade and a weapon upgrade w. tomestone for weapon.)(SAM had 5 savage drops and 2 upgrade items)

I then told him that he must've not been present for the conversation.The tanks and healers were upset that they hadn't gotten gear in 3 weeks. I asked the entire static if anyone needed the twine. GNB said that If SAM or NIN didn't need it, then I get it. I said again, IF SOMEONE NEEDS IT, I WILL PASS ON IT FOR THEM TO GET IT. Everyone passed on it, and I got it. WHM then asked me, AFTER everyone passed on it why i needed it. I said I was going to use it for my boots or Headpiece. He said, but you have the boots. I told him I misspoke and meant to say my head piece. He said "but you don't have it." I said I was getting it when we got out of raid. He said "I don't agree with that, but OK."

Even AFTER all of this was said to me, NIN said "why didnt you ask me if I needed the twine?" I said that I did ask, BUT he was not there. He then said, "you couldn't wait 5 minutes to ask me?" But, the problem with this is, HE ALREADY PASSED ON THE ITEM! If he really needed it, then he would have said so prior to going to the restroom. He would have not clicked PASS before leaving his desk. This was just a ploy to gaslight me into thinking that I did something wrong when I didn't.

All the while I was getting upset because he wasn't giving me any benefit of the doubt. So I started to raise my voice, and he said "WHY ARE YOU YELLING AND I JUST GOT OFF OF WORK!! YOURE STARTING TO PISS ME OFF!" I apologized and said that it was just because I was upset is all, and he said "WELL YOU PISSED OFF HALF OF THE FUCKING STATIC!! WHY ARE 3/4 PEOPLE MAD AT YOU AND IM THE ONE GETTING ROASTED FOR IT!!!"

The conversation ended with him basically just coming at me saying things like, "You also don't like to talk to us". I explained to him that I had someone in the other room that was being loud and I had my mic muted to avoid noise from coming through. He said "Yeah i made the right choice because It seems like your irl stuff gets in the way of raid."

From there it was just him basically saying things like "you need to find a static that works for you where your irl life doesn't get in the way," and "Obviously if 3 or 4 people are coming to me about one person, then that means you don't fit the vibe! And you need to go." He then asked me if I wanted to still be friends with him, and I told him its too awkward right now because he did not do what I think a friend should do when it comes to having to remove them from the static. There is a right way and a wrong way to do things, and he definitely did it the wrong way.

Once again, I am not upset that I got kicked from the static, I am upset at the fact that all of these reasons were new info to me. Even though some of them were LIES, and I have people in the static that will also agree that some of the things that were said were not true, he never had a conversation with me about any of these things.

As for if I want to be friends with him or not, I honestly do not want to. The behavior that he showed to me that day was very nasty and evil spirited. I have never seen that side of him before and I do not think that it is right for me to continue to stay in that environment any longer. I plan on leaving his discord and i have already removed him as a friend. I am sure he does not care, as he is the type of person that would rather not try and fix a relationship and instead just allow it to die with no remorse.
Commentaires (7)

Seva Topside

Lich [Light]

I stopped doing Synced Savage content years ago since watching videos became mandatory thing to even practice the raid and I am so happy with my choice leaving all this clutter behind. I suggest finding people who doesn't do Schedules for raids mainly look for people who doesn't work at all or have timed playtimes, they are rare but they exist. Look for Sublime NEETS. Good luck in your life at 1st and raids at 2nd.

Annabel Ashcroft

Faerie [Aether]

I don't do current Savage but older MINE savage content, and as a healer main I will tell you that yes, you DO coordinate with the DPS's when mit is most needed. We have specific mechanics where the mit is held until used there. Why? because it helps the healers out a LOT and they don't get overwhelmed.

And I am sorry, real life situations ALWAYS trump the static/raid/game, whatever! But if it starts getting too much in the way of static attendance, it is probably best to leave the static.

Tiara Clavaris

Phantom [Chaos]

Savage is the place where most friendship perish . Only enter savage if you are prepared the worst outcome. Is a raid that bring frustration and stress to people. I personally already retire from savage raids. Well there are plenty of static out there needs you. Good luck in your new group.

Vidette Swiftbolt

Raiden [Light]

Oh they were talking about you, just behind your back. Seems they were looking for reasons to get rid of you.

Ce commentaire a été supprimé par son auteur.

Enesha Melwalx

Zodiark [Light]

Reminds me a bit about my previous one, but on reverse… I disbanded it in the end because we had clashing PoV and it really devastated me because I thought we all were on the same page, after a year of playing together.

I’m sorry to read your tale. There may be more to know of this whole situation, but at the end of the day, if a team doesn’t match your way of playing and your necessity, it’s best to let go and try again. No need to corroborate yourself. I wish you all the best for your next!

Tyfany Quah

Behemoth [Primal]

comes out of this life will play your game alone even forget savage doesn't add anything be happy

Celes Bradford

Typhon [Elemental]

To be honest. You are better off without them. You should be playing what you like to play. Not what someone else tells you to play.
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