Tiara Clavaris

Tonberry (Elemental)

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  • 8

The Struggle in LDR

LDR= Long Distance Relationship

With the new beau that I met online recently...

I feel like as if I’m dating a ghost.

He can’t be seen or touched. I can only feel his feeling through text.

It definitely strengthens our bond a lot more than meeting face to face.

We can’t really lie or pretend. We had to be really honest and straightforward between each other.

When I had my first argument with him yesterday, there were ton of anxiety.

I ended up feeling fear of abandonment. I tried to erase him many many times from my phone.
He keeps trying to reach me somehow.

It makes me happy but well..

It’s going to be a long way of suffering.

I feel lonely at times. I keep imagining him somehow lying next to me and everything.

When he declared that he is in love with me and everything I’ll be honest even though I was happy I’m confuse. I struggle to accept it because well..

I don’t know where this is going...

There is still no hint of COVID-19 outbreak ending. No vaccine seems invented yet. My career is not doing so well. Countries on lock down.

Me also partly wonder if we meet is he going to like the real me?

Or rather the person he imagine. Am I going to like the person ?

How much longer should I endure this?

That’s why I wanted to give up maaany maaany times .

He keeps coming back, coming back...

Last night argument he told me he was upset that he found out I tried to erase him.

He said everything I said last night was “gibberish” lul.

I think I was quite emotional 😳 last night it feels kind of embarrassing but whatever!

I just hope God really give me strength to endure this for the sake of love ( T_T).

I wonder if I’ll be living in Europe in the future..? The dream land country filled with buildings that you would see on Ishgard. I googled his city. It is filled with castles, boats, bridges, docks, and boats... Reminds me of either world of Narnia or Altissia (FFXV)

Wonder what will be like ... I wonder if it’s going to last..?

I wanted to keep our relationship light and friendly but he suddenly said he is in love with me Orz.

It going to get harder and tougher. Love is such an emotional word Orz that I’m not sure I could handle them.

It’s going to take a large amount of patience and inner strength if we really going to try and make this work and last..

I think.

I just hope for the best.

I was so ready though if he decides to leave me for someone else. It’s kind of hard to believe such a guy like him could endure it. Like I said before when I first see his picture I immediately feel like he is the kind of guy who could get woman’s attention quite easily.. He is really attractive.

I consider it a miracle if we really do eventually meet.

I don’t know if it’s going to last. I just have to prepare for the worst, and move on.

I had to wait till the day he grow bored and tired of me.. Probably.

Unless luck is on my side and the world let us be together and all....
Commentaires (8)

Serena Sable

Louisoix (Chaos)

A vaccine will take years.

Serena Sable

Louisoix (Chaos)

LDR takes a lot of commitment, trust and a lot of communication. What youre feeling is normal, however if you give into your doubts it will fail. I feel that he tossed you the L word way too soon though, and its scared you a bit - you may not be fully committed yet unlike him. It took some 5 months before me and my ex wife confessed our love to each other.

Tiara Clavaris

Tonberry (Elemental)

Thanks Serena. I’m doing my best. good for you and your wife ended up together..

Serena Sable

Louisoix (Chaos)

Well not anymore, we divorced last month. Didnt leave because of me though. I still love and want her.

LDRs are not meant to be permanent. One or both of you will eventually have to make a choice, when it goes on long enough.

Tiara Clavaris

Tonberry (Elemental)

Yeah feeling can change. I’m sorry to hear that. Well a life long commitment means withstanding the good and the bad. Which I admit, it seems incredibly hard . 50% of people failed to make a life long commitment. But that’s okay, you are not defined by your relationship status

Serena Sable

Louisoix (Chaos)

Her feelings didnt change. Its much more complicated than that. She was abused in her marriage before meeting me, I got the left overs. I tend to attract the broken women some other guy fucked up. I can help them partially recover but not thier whole self. Long story short, she chose her kids from that marriage over me. The other ex husband used them to control her.

Serena Sable

Louisoix (Chaos)

Anyway, if you feel pressure or things feel hasty, tell him to put on the breaks, so to speak.

Tiara Clavaris

Tonberry (Elemental)

Thanks Serena. So far we are good!
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