Bongaboi Pangyatoy

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The Lore Of Cristobal Colon, The Big Ripper


If I grossed you out somehow in this entry, I've done my job.

I woke up from a massive power nap, awakened by the phone going off. (I am on pins and needles for the phone call, as it might be some people interviewing me for personal relief benefits in the wake of the viral primal Kwehrona and her wake.) I dreamt that a couple of manga doujin tankoubons were made after my lore, a song was named in my honor, I was interviewing the Houkago Tea Time girls in a pool while keeping my manga dry and I was escorting BongaSis from the John Wayne Airport home...while carrying my daki of one of my employees, Miss Georgette Lemare, who was munching in smallclothes.

As I watch my appetite and personal gormandizing get curbed by this pandemic, I take this time to talk about the lore of my personal...colon. Yes, would you believe it, I even have lore for my personal functioning organs. I have a very loquacious colon indeed. His name is Cristobal. Now, Cristobal is a very voracious degustator of things that man consumes, he is a colon of 35 summers and counting.

Whenever he is stimulated by something I eat, whether it's eggs, dairy, high fiber content, vegetables, and so on, I am literally on the bed and cannot move one. bloody. bit. And why is that? As I lie on the bed, clutching my dakis for life as if my own sanity depends on it...Cristobal lets out a mighty roar. And another rip. And yet another rip. Every massive rip that comes out of Cristobal is akin to an intestinal...orgasm. It is said that on his day, Cristobal lets out 10, maybe 11 of these before finally getting his rocks off, but again, who's counting? Not me, of course!

And the aether that comes out of my round ponze-for-ponze backside when Cristobal satisfies his own thrice-damned cravings for unrecognizable indulgences big and small is so strong I can't even sense it. Perhaps the viral primal has been so destructive in its ruthlessness that my even own sense of smell has become its own casualty so I don't really know how bad it really is in my personal nook! Nonetheless, a beneficial side effect from Cristobal's own moment of sordid glory is that I am able to get a decent seven, eight extra hours of sleep that I did not know I actually needed.

I asked Bae, how long are you going to cosplay as Bunsleen Bunforgiven and go back to being you? She simply said, "when I have the means to go back to be a Plainsfolk, of course!" I don't know when that will be, or exactly what that means, but something tells me that ere long, she will be smaller than me again in size and that means some extra special moments are in the making. I haven't tried on the new outfit, but soon, I will give it a go.
Commentaires (1)

Kahori Harukawa

Coeurl (Crystal)

Oh my. Well, thanks for sharing such a...surreal entry, I guess!
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